Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
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