Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
