Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
this will be a night to untag.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
