Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
