It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
