do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
i think i just naturally attract stoners
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
