I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
