this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
