My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
