I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
