Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize