office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
