so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Im part way to drunk.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
