we have officially lost it.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
