But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
