the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize