P.S. I can't hear my feet
honey bunches of taint.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize
