i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Randomize
