you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize