since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
