Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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