Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
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