Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
