I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
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