WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
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