how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Randomize
