How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
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