Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
