So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I will pee on everything he values.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
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