Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i just had sex bonerless
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
