There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
