Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
So many bounce houses so little time
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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