just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
