Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize