Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
