you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
