after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
