and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I will be naked everywhere
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
