Don't make out with my wife yet
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Randomize
