do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
