So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
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