ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Holy shit dude........stairs
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
