Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
