yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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