Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
