How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
