That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
