My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
