Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize