Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
