hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
